Think Goose!

What a nice wake me up. My Pandora is playing Disney tunes. First, Part of Your World and now Hakuna Matata. Reminded me of a story that I hope you’ll enjoy. As always, laughter is always welcome.

I got this idea into my head (yes, I have awesome ideas most times :P) that my husband and I should go walking in nature one Sunday. It looked like it was going to rain but it hadn’t started yet and we were up early enough, I figured we could go walk a mile or two before the rain started.

There are quite a few metroparks in and around our town. There was one right around the corner that seemed promising. I always saw it driving on the way home and figured it would be a nice little walk. When we got there, turned out this park was just a dock point for kayaks. I took some pictures especially of the geese because it’s baby season and Canada geese all over have been rapid, reproducing machines.

I should have known that was a sign.

We decided to drive to the Gorge Metropark instead since that’s a tried and true nice, long hiking trail. We get there and instead of taking the trail to the giant waterfall dam, we take a route we hadn’t walked before. I’d say about 7 minutes into the walk we encounter Goosey Lucy on the trail. She is not happy to see us. We get the hiss treatment and the stink eye. Luckily, there’s enough trail that we could stride widely and slowly around her. We didn’t see any other geese around her so I attributed it to her being a morning grump. I’m a grumps in the morning cause my bed is so comfortable that I don’t want to leave it but priorities and all that; grumps until I fully wake up then I’m less grumps.

I want to say we walked a total of 3 miles. It started raining on us and we kept going forward cause the trees were a natural barrier and my husband and the foresight to grab an umbrella. At one point we decided to turn around because the way metroparks work in Ohio, you could literally walk from one city to another through the parks. They’re quite extensive. One of the highlights on this trail was getting to see the dam from top side.

You know that feeling when your legs are tired but the best relief is to walk a little faster or run because regular speed hurts too much? That’s basically what we had going on plus we were getting hungry so we hustled back at a faster pace.

We get back to the spot were we saw Goosey Lucy only to encounter Goosey Brucey as well. Now we’re getting two stink eyes and double the hissing. They’re taking up more of the trail this time. We start to give them a wide berth like we did the first time but they spread their wings and take steps towards us!

My husband tries to keep walking. I grab him by the elbow to stop him.

Him: Why are we stopping?

Me: Because these geese are giving us their “I’m going to kill you stances” which means there are probably babies in that tall grass.

Sure enough I was right. Three goslings walk out to stand with their parents.

Him: Okay, so? We’ll just walk quickly.

Me: No we aren’t.

Him: I have the umbrella. We can use it as a shield.

Me: That umbrella has a sharp point! I don’t want to be responsible for injuring a goose.

Him: They won’t get my wife!

Me: My hero.

Him: Yes, I am.

Me: You do know a goose attack can break bones right? People underestimate the power of their wings.

Him: I can take ’em!

He was getting upset cause they were hissing in earnest now. I’m like they’re just protecting their babies. It reminded me of my trumpeter swan days when us group of college students had to basically steal 6 babies from their parents before they fledged. It was part of a breeding program and definitely a story for another day.

The geese must have realized we wouldn’t move until they did because they started walking ahead on the trail. My husband and I followed slowly behind with our umbrella shield and I couldn’t help but thinking about that scene in Aristocats where the geese teach the cats how to waddle like geese.

The geese fam walked off into the tall grass and Brucey stays on the edge of the trail eyeing us as we pass. We’re five steps away when my husband turns around and goes, “You’re lucky my wife is holding me back or I’d take you on!” I wasn’t holding him at all. I was certainly laughing though, especially when he wrapped my arm around him to simulate me “holding him back”.

Silly man.


14 thoughts on “Think Goose!

    1. Right! I really didn’t want to take him to the hospital for getting into a fight with a goose, haha. Can you imagine the look on the doctor’s face? “Sir, how did you get your injury?” “Well you see doctor there was this goose…”


    1. Hahaha self promote anytime you want! I remember that post! They would probably be great goose hating friends 😂😂 Canada geese are brave too! Humans mean nothing to them!


    1. Hahaha! They’d have to get past the feral cat who always tries to walk in when we get the mail! I bet the Goosey would win too!


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