“Please, Thank You, I’m Sorry”

Recently I was talking with my coworker because she was feeling down and out about how she goes above and beyond for people and hardly ever receive a simple thank you or even credit for the hard work she’s put in. It mostly stemmed from the fact that, as I mentioned in a previous post, my boss was in a car accident and has needed a ton of help these days. As much as we are willing to do whatever she needs for us to do to make her life easier, it hasn’t escaped our notice that we aren’t acknowledged for a job well done or for going above and beyond our pay grade to make sure her life is easier. Instead, it has become more demanding.

When I was younger, the first words that got drilled into my head were “please, thank you, and I’m sorry”. Whenever you want or need something, it should always start or end with please. “I need a favor. Do you think you can help me please?”, “When you get a chance, can you please….” are just a few examples. Automatically following the response you receive, even if it’s negative, should be a thank you. “Thank you so much. I really appreciate it.” “That’s okay. Thanks anyway.” When people don’t use either of these it comes out more of a demand instead of a polite question. In the case of asking for a favor, if you ask for a favor and this favor is granted, you should give credit where credit is due. Say you couldn’t figure out how to formulate an Excel sheet at work and you got help for it before presenting it to your boss. Just thanking your coworker is not enough. You should let your boss know that you at least had help and couldn’t have perfected the worksheet without so and so’s help.

Lastly, the universal, “I’m sorry“. It’s not only used in sad situations. Loss and grieving people appreciate hearing “I’m so sorry for your loss.” However, and I’ve had to do this, I pitched an idea that was not my own to my boss once and I gave the credit to my coworker because it wasn’t my idea. Only problem was, she wanted to pitch it herself and didn’t appreciate that I offered it up before she could even though I did give the correct credit. I apologized for that and remembered that for the future. Another example is when someone thinks they’re 100% right and makes it a point to almost rub it in your face. When it’s all said and done and it comes out that they were wrong, the first thing out of their mouth should be “I’m sorry” but most often it’s still a case of someone trying to prove in some form that they were still right even if it wasn’t 100%.

Simple accolades such as these would honestly make for a nicer world. Yet, these phrases are so foreign to some that it’s just so sad. This has been on my mind for a while and I just continually think of how more and more individuals are becoming immune to the fact that they aren’t receiving the accolades they deserve even if it’s something as simple as leaving a book review or sharing someone else’s post. I know I’m guilty of it because I’m terrible at Twitter but I try to acknowledge when I notice even if it’s late. I also make it a point to respond to all comments left on my blog or ones that were responded to that I left on someone else’s blog. I just hope this immunity doesn’t continue because it just makes us all much more cold as human beings and we don’t want to turn into emotionless robots now do we?

What do you think about accolades given or received? Were these phrases taught and ingrained into at a young age like they were for me? Do you have any experiences similar to mine you’d like to share? Let me know in the comments below!

18 thoughts on ““Please, Thank You, I’m Sorry”

  1. In work situations in particular, I find thank you goes a really long way. Yes it’s my job and yes i have to do it but i was always really happy to do something for or with a supervisor who would take the time to say Thanks, even though they didn’t have to. It really made a difference to my mind set. I make sure to do that now with even my students. Thanking them for handing up their essays. Lol. Some of them think it’s weird but others like it. It’s just my way of saying I acknowledge the work you did (even if your grade…well…. 😉 )

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    1. I agree so much! I think its the highlight of a good leader especially when you’re a supervisor when you can say please and thank you on a regular basis. Yes! Agreed! It makes a HUGE difference in the mindset and usually it ends up being reciporcated. Hahahaha Thank you for your essay even if it’s an F huh? 😉 hahaha love it.

      Liked by 1 person

        1. Lol, I bet. I would hate to be the student that gets an F though but most of the time it’s probably deserved cause there was no effort put into it.

          Liked by 1 person

  2. So often I hear of people who receive what might be a nice gift or gesture from someone and immediately start to gripe about it. In my mind, I always think, “What happened to just saying Thank You?” All of the negative commentaries in the world is the problem. A few well-placed words as you have suggested could save everything one act at a time.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are so right. Even if it’s something you don’t like or know you won’t like, it’s still that thought that counts and should be thanked. Yes. I agree with you 100% Darlene!

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  3. It’s easy to get into a tunnel-visioned rut and forget to give praise. It’s also easy to get into the rut of not getting any and therefore refusing to give some. It does boil down to leading by example and sometimes those leaders need a reminder that a small “thank you” can go a long way.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s very true. I think my boss has the tunnel vision right now. I sort of had to nudge her the last time to say thank you because it had been a week and I worked my ass off. You know that’s true too. People get of the mentality that since they aren’t receiving it, they aren’t going to give it anymore but that just makes things worse imo. Lead by example like you say is always the best way.

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  4. Thank you, please and sorry are all really important words, but they shouldn’t be used too often! Sorry means a lot more if you only use it when you really mean it. People shouldn’t apologise for themselves all of the time.

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  5. I do really think that the world would be nicer with some basic niceties. Although I’d probably be just fine with someone pitching my idea, as long as they gave me credit, but whatever, sometimes people want to do things themselves, so I kind of get that. I hear you about the twitter thing- I am always so slow on there, but try to acknowledge everything. When it comes to comments I’m just gonna have to admit to being a *guilty blogger* cos I have a lot on and need to spend more time catching up :/ I just feel *so much guilt* about it but there’s not much I can do (at least no one could say I’m emotionless about it lol 😉 ) Anyway, I love what Nina said about thanking people for essays though- I wish I’d had a professor like that- they’d have been an instant fave!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah. I’d be fine with that as well but pitching the idea as their own is not cool. You’re better at Twitter than me! Well blog Twitter. I’m the worst. So if you’re slow, I’m like glacial slow, haha. I understand you with your comments though. You have such a HUGE following, I’m sure it’s hard to catch up some days. You shouldn’t be guilty though. You make it a point to acknowledge as much as time allows you and I think that’s pretty awesome.
      I know right! Where were these professors when I was in school?? Haha

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I was taught it and I teach it to my offspring too, it does seem to be less common though. I’m not great at replying to blog comments but I always ‘like’ those comments, sometimes I just don’t know what to say beyond ‘thanks’ and that feels a bit lame so I think ‘oh I’ll do it later’ then later I think ‘it’s too late now!’ hehe. But you are great at it and I really appreciate that, thanks! And I’m sorry if I don’t respond to any comments you leave me but please don’t let that stop you from commenting 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes. That’s what I mean. It seems like it’s dying. Like how they say chilvary is dead. It’s sad. Oh I totally understand what you mean when it comes to certain comments or forgetting to comment, haha. No need to apologize to me! I totally get it and I won’t be stopping commenting on your blog ever. Your content is way too good for that! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  7. This post resonates so much with me. Those 3 phrases were drilled into us as kids too, and Mom just wouldn’t let us get away with not asking, not apologizing and saying thank you even if the result wasn’t in our favor. Given I live in country where someone will bump into you and not apologize, it takes everything in me to not pull them by the ear and ask them if they were never taught the “three magic words”. So hard.
    It sure would be a nicer world if people used these more, that I agree with!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aww I’m glad I could resonate with you. ❤ Ugh, I hate that. I always feel like I need to apologize immediately when I bump into someone but people can be so rude. Yes, I have to hold back my "EXCUSE YOU!" cause you just never know the personality you might be dealing with that day. Yes! We can only hope I suppose at this rate.

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