Recently I was talking with my coworker because she was feeling down and out about how she goes above and beyond for people and hardly ever receive a simple thank you or even credit for the hard work she’s put in. It mostly stemmed from the fact that, as I mentioned in a previous post, my boss was in a car accident and has needed a ton of help these days. As much as we are willing to do whatever she needs for us to do to make her life easier, it hasn’t escaped our notice that we aren’t acknowledged for a job well done or for going above and beyond our pay grade to make sure her life is easier. Instead, it has become more demanding.
When I was younger, the first words that got drilled into my head were “please, thank you, and I’m sorry”. Whenever you want or need something, it should always start or end with please. “I need a favor. Do you think you can help me please?”, “When you get a chance, can you please….” are just a few examples. Automatically following the response you receive, even if it’s negative, should be a thank you. “Thank you so much. I really appreciate it.” “That’s okay. Thanks anyway.” When people don’t use either of these it comes out more of a demand instead of a polite question. In the case of asking for a favor, if you ask for a favor and this favor is granted, you should give credit where credit is due. Say you couldn’t figure out how to formulate an Excel sheet at work and you got help for it before presenting it to your boss. Just thanking your coworker is not enough. You should let your boss know that you at least had help and couldn’t have perfected the worksheet without so and so’s help.
Lastly, the universal, “I’m sorry“. It’s not only used in sad situations. Loss and grieving people appreciate hearing “I’m so sorry for your loss.” However, and I’ve had to do this, I pitched an idea that was not my own to my boss once and I gave the credit to my coworker because it wasn’t my idea. Only problem was, she wanted to pitch it herself and didn’t appreciate that I offered it up before she could even though I did give the correct credit. I apologized for that and remembered that for the future. Another example is when someone thinks they’re 100% right and makes it a point to almost rub it in your face. When it’s all said and done and it comes out that they were wrong, the first thing out of their mouth should be “I’m sorry” but most often it’s still a case of someone trying to prove in some form that they were still right even if it wasn’t 100%.
Simple accolades such as these would honestly make for a nicer world. Yet, these phrases are so foreign to some that it’s just so sad. This has been on my mind for a while and I just continually think of how more and more individuals are becoming immune to the fact that they aren’t receiving the accolades they deserve even if it’s something as simple as leaving a book review or sharing someone else’s post. I know I’m guilty of it because I’m terrible at Twitter but I try to acknowledge when I notice even if it’s late. I also make it a point to respond to all comments left on my blog or ones that were responded to that I left on someone else’s blog. I just hope this immunity doesn’t continue because it just makes us all much more cold as human beings and we don’t want to turn into emotionless robots now do we?
What do you think about accolades given or received? Were these phrases taught and ingrained into at a young age like they were for me? Do you have any experiences similar to mine you’d like to share? Let me know in the comments below!